Extract from Fiqh-us-Sunnah Volume:4 Number 85,
Removes Misconception
Imam Malik and some Hanafi
scholars, and, according to one report from Ahmad, most of the scholars hold
it permissible for women to visit graves. This is based on the following
hadith from 'Aishah, "What should I say to them, O Messenger of Allah when
visiting graves?" As mentioned above Abdallah ibn Abi Mulaikah is also
reported to have said, "Once 'Aishah returned after visiting the
graveyard. I asked, 'O Mother of the Believers, where have you been?' She said:
'I went out to visit the grave of my brother Abd ar-Rahman.' I asked her:
'Didn't the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, prohibit visiting graves?'
She said, 'Yes, he did forbid visiting graves during the early days, but
later on he ordered us to visit them'." This is reported by Al-Hakim
and Al-Baihaqi, who also remarked that this hadith was narrated only by Bistam
bin Muslim al-Basri. Adh-Dhahabi said that it is a sound hadith.
Anas reported: "The
Prophet, peace be upon him, saw a woman crying by the grave of her son, and
said to her, 'Fear Allah, and be patient.' She replied, 'What do you care about
my tragedy?' When he went away, someone told her, 'Indeed, that was the
Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him. 'The woman felt extremely sorry and she
immediately went to the Prophet's house, where she did not find any guards. She
called out: 'O Messenger of Allah! I did not recognize you.' The Prophet, peace
be upon him, said, 'Verily patience is needed at the time of the first affliction'.''
(Bukhari and Muslim) This supports the argument in favor of the
permissibility of women visiting graves, for the Prophet, peace be upon him,
saw her at the grave and did not show his disapproval of it.
The purpose of visiting
graves is to remember the Hereafter, which is something that both men and women
need. Men are by no means more in need of this
reminder than women. Some scholars disliked it for women to visit graves
as they are less patient and too emotional. The Prophet, peace be upon him,
said, "May Allah curse the women who are frequent visitors of the
graves." (Reported by Ahmad, Ibn Majah, and Tirmidhi, who said that it is
a sound hadith)
Al-Qurtubi said: "The
curse mentioned in this hadith applies only to those women who visit graves
frequently. The reason for this curse lies perhaps in the fact that it
involves infringement of the rights of the husband, and leads to adornment
and exhibition of their beauty to strangers, and shouting, yelling, and
other similar things." It may be said that, "If no such harm is
feared from women visiting graves, then there is no valid reason for preventing
them from visiting graves, for indeed remembrance of death is something
that both men and women equally need." Commenting on Al-Qurtubi's view,
Ash-Shawkani said, "This statement may form the basis for reconciling
apparently contradictory hadith."
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